Happy 8th Birthday Andrea!

Happy 8th Birthday to our little princess Andrea!!!

Thank you to all our friends and families who have been part of Andrea's special day yesterday! Thank you Ms. Lhen for being a great party host! Super enjoy! For everyone who have been praying for Andrea, Thank you!

Thank you Lord for making this celebration possible and fun!

Andrea's on the Right Track

It's been almost a year since Andrea started her therapies. So far so good. Right now, she's been able to strengthen her muscles on her back, arms and abdomen. Her sitting balance improved a lot compared to last year. She was able to loose weight or rather maintain her weight since she's getting taller.

She doesn't talk yet but she's learning a lot of things. Simple tasks like taking off her shoes and socks. Holding her spoon towards her mouth when eating. Managing to sit on a chair on her own. Although she still needs to be motivated from time to time.

These are good signs that we're on the right track.

Thank you, Lord! ^_^

Facts about Diarrhea

Andrea is having diarrhea for a week now. Thank God she doesn't have any fever at all.

Her doctor said, few years back, as long as there is no fever we can treat her at home. We only have to keep her off from being dehydrated. So he suggested giving her a Gatorade instead of plain water. It should help to replenish the lost fluids and electrolytes in her body. We did not know that this could make things worst. After reading an article over the net, we gave her Pedialyte instead. Oral electrolyte solutions are regarded as the best choice because they offer the right amounts of water, salt, and sugar needed to replace the essential fluids lost during a bout of diarrhea.

Food taken could also worsen the diarrhea. Andrea's nutritionist suggested food that should not be given to her. Dairy products like milk, cheese. Vegetables that are high in fiber like green leafy vegetables. Fatty and spicy food like fried food. We are also advised to give her bananas and apples.

Hope she get well soon.

New Things for Andrea!

What am I so excited about?!

Andrea will have her modified wheelchair soon! We already found a company who's modifying wheelchairs. Handicap International lead us to Freedom Technology who manufactures and distributes wheelchairs specifically tailored to the body measurement, posture, lifestyle and environment of persons with disability thus ensuring optimum safety, function, and fit. Only God knows, she might be able to walk someday! ^_^

Rosalyn, a physiotherapist, who took Andrea's measurement for the wheelchair, mentioned about Trichet Learning Center here in Taguig. We asked if they can accommodate Andrea. She said the only available slot is for PT. So we enrolled her this morning! And she will start her rehabilitation on Monday! She will eventually have a school uniform and ID. I can't wait to see her in uniform. ^_^

Thank you Lord for providing everything! We love you so much!!!!!

Body Brace

I don't know if it's a good thing or a bad thing.

We went to Ortho Frey in Pasig to ask any recommendation for Andrea's body brace. But as they see her spinal x-ray, they concluded that bracing is not an option for her right now unless after spinal surgery. Her spinal curve is already at 80 degrees and braces are only recommended if the curve is around 50 degrees. To cut the story short, body brace won't help my Andrea.

On the other hand, when I saw a sample brace, I was relieved that she's not going to wear one. Seeing her on that brace would only make her very uncomfortable. She only have limited movements now due to her paralyzed lower extremities. And this would only aggravate the situation.

I don't know now what will happen next. We don't want her to go through any surgery right now. Hopefully this aqua therapy would ease any pressure on her back. Still praying for what's best for her.

Lord, please be our guide. We know we're on a crossroad right now. We do not know what to do next. Please help us do the right thing and lead us to the right path. Let your will be done, Lord.  
By the way, thank You for easing the pain. Thank you for always being there. I love you! We love you so much!

Special Education Week

Children with special needs like my daughter Andrea don't have an illness, so there is no cure and it's not contagious. They want what we all want - to be accepted and loved. Thanks to all of you who copied and pasted this in the past few days. It's special education week and this is in honor of all the kids who need a little extra help and understanding.

Aqua Therapy

Andrea enjoyed her aqua therapy today! I'm so happy for her! ^_^

During Aquatic Therapy, A child is immersed in water and is able to perform exercises. Water reduces the pressure on bones and joints which enables the child to move freely. This benefits the child by strengthening muscle tone, improving coordination and increasing endurance.

Mommy, will you please stay?!

I was so touched with the letter of my niece Bea to her mommy Gie, my sister. She ask her mom to stay home or let her go with her at the office. She said she will just sit on her lap or hide beside her computer so nobody will see her. So sweet!

I remember back when we were at her age, we always wanted to be with our Mama Connie. When she goes out for a business meeting, we plead to accompany her wherever it maybe. There's also something special about my mom's smell... a relaxing feeling of security. I guess the bond between a child and a mom is stronger than anything else.

Here's a portion of Gie's blog:

"While I was preparing to leave, she approached me and gave me something rolled and tied with her red sanrio rubberband. It was a letter, a plead i guess... and as i read her handwritten note I felt something warm flowing below my eyes... It made me teary eyed...well, it made me cry... her letter literally was cutting my heart into pieces... then I rolled it again. "

Being a full-time mother is one of the highest salaried jobs in my field, since the payment is pure love.  ~Mildred B. Vermont


Now, I miss my Andrea and can't wait till I get home and feel her hug!


I love you, Mama. Wish I could be there with you always. 


:")

Crossroads

It's our first visit to an Orthopedic doctor. As recommended by Andrea's physical therapist and referred by her pedia dev doctor, we went to the Philippine Orthopedic Institute in Makati today. Our main concern was to know more about Andrea's developing scoliosis. And if there are any precautions we need to take during her therapy.  Recommendations on the wheelchair modification as well.



But it was more than what I expected to know. I tried to consume all of what the doctor had to say so I know what to do next. :'(

Andrea had a series of spinal x-ray. It's actually my first time to see an xray of her spine. We know that she has a thoracic level of spinal cord defect (T5-T8). That's why her legs and trunks were paralyzed. The doctor said her spine had a moderate outward curve which is why she has a tendency to slouch when sitting. And when not properly handled, the bone might protrude and may cause further problems. He said she also had a congenital rib gap defect which constrict her lungs and this might cause some pulmonary complications as she grows up. This is also one of the possible reason why she lost her speech because of the insufficient air thru her lungs.

He suggested having these corrected through surgery. But he still have to meet with her pulmonary doctor. They still need to talk about her case and how they will handle it or if it's really necessary at this stage. She is at the growth stage, so having this operation will still cause some problem as her bone develop.


We told him that as much as possible surgery is not an option for us since we're not sure if she can handle it. He suggested putting braces on her as well as wheelchair modifications. But avoiding surgery might also cause complications and restrictions for her in the near future.

Being on a crossroad again gives me chest pains. Because the last time we decided to do what's suggested to be best for her, she lost her eyesight. Now, are we ready to take another risk?

May the Lord God guide us.

Kudos To All Nanny

Sometimes, I feel intimidated when Andrea's nanny knows more about her than me. Well, maybe i'm just jealous of the fact that she's there for her most of the time. I, as a working mom, have to spend the whole day at the office. So to compansate, I see to it that we still have some bonding time and quality time together.

Getting someone to do house chores is easy. But entrusting your most precious angel to the hand of a stranger is a different thing. That's why I'm very thankful to all of Andrea's nannies. I know they loved her so much and cared for her. They have been a part of Andrea's life. They've been a part of me too.

Thank you for being there.

Kudos to Ate Rolly, Jen and Ces. Kudos to all nanny.

Reality at a Glance

Last weekend, I am very emotional. But I haven't shared this feelings with anyone. I can't... because I know the moment I open my heart, I will cry. I tried to detach my mind and heart from reality, but still, it hurts me the most.

I've already accepted Andrea's condition after I gave birth to her 7 years ago. I know the fact that she may not be able to walk someday. At least she can hug me tight and kiss me, recognize my face and my voice.

I planned to teach her some computer games that i enjoyed playing, maybe she will also enjoy it when she grows up. I also pictured us doing some hairstyle on her and wearing the same dress. We can read books together, sing together [I know she has a very beautiful voice] and go shopping at the malls together.

But these are just mere deceptions now.

Andrea lost her sight after her last operation 4 years ago. A pressure inflicted to her brain caused an irrevocable damage to her eyesight. Two years ago, she just lost her speech for reasons we, and her doctors, could not explain. She's on therapy now, hoping for some progress.

The truth is that she can't see my face again. The truth is that I could not hear her saying "Mommy" again. These realities are breaking my heart into pieces. I cannot think about more of the other "What-if"s.

I'm just not ready. Not yet.

T_T

A Mom's Journal

When it comes to my baby. I am very emotional. I guess every mommy does. But i tried to compose myself when I'm getting too emotional.

They said being a parent alone is hard. What's more being a parent to a very special child? It's always been a struggle for me not to cry when there's some serious talks about my daughter's condition.

To help me lighten up during some tough times. I'll just try to share it to you.

Starting from today, I will write my life's journal as Andrea's Mom.

Scars of Bravery

Andrea's hair is getting longer and thicker everyday. After taking a bath, I see to it that her hair were properly clip up off her face so it would not irritate her face and eyes. This is also the time I was able to examine the scars in her head. She got this big scars from her operation last Nov 2006.

For some they may see these scars as signs of tough times and adversities. But for me, I see these scars as signs of "Bravery", a quality of spirit that enables you to face pain without showing fear. She faced all these trials with a smile as if saying "Don't worry mommy, I will be better soon!"

That's my Andrea! And I'm proud of her.

Speech Therapy Session 1

Andrea started her first speech therapy session last Friday, Nov. 20, 2009. We brought some things needed for her assessment like rice and viand, banana, a cracker, chiffon cake, water and the utensils she usually use.

And here's the result:

For FEEDING SKILLS, this is to assess integrity of oral structures during feeding.
Activity used: Feeding of banana, chiffon cake and rice and tuna.
Andrea's Rate: Can do better.
Remarks: She still used primitive biting pattern, usually sucks and suckles, movement of tongue noted given input and prompts.


For ORAL STIMULATION , this is to provide sensory input to address mobility/strength of lips, cheeks, jaw and tongue.
Activity Used: Feeding session, passive exercise, and face massage.
Andrea's Rate: Can do better.
Remarks: Lip lateralization are spontaneous, given input to do tongue elevation and lateralization.


For PRECURSIVE LANGUAGE SKILLS,
   a) reach for help
   b) regulate/ask
   c) identification/show recognition
Activity Used: infortalk, sound-producing toys, shape sorter
Andrea's Rate: Can do better.
Remarks: Generally guided most of the time. Can identify mommy, daddy by reaching.

Speech and OT Therapy Program

Two weeks ago, I had a chance to call The Able Center in Makati and inquire about the availabiliy of a Speech therapy. We were scheduled Friday that week at 9:00am. On that day, we were late but luckily they were still able to accomodate us. Teacher Jeremy was the therapist assigned to Andrea. As per his assessment, her case will be very challenging for them and maybe for us. Since she had a multiple disablity, the mode of input will be limited to auditory and touch. We know it will be quite of a challenge but we are most willing to take the chance to improve her current ability. We believe this is the right time for her to learn new things outside her comfort zone. And we believe in her.

I am also embracing my time since my working hours now is after 4pm. So I have the whole morning taking care of her .

Teacher Jeremy also advised us to have an occupational therapist. Here, she will be taught of things on how she will communicate with us like ask for help, sit on her own and maybe eat on her own. But before that we still have to go to a Rehab doctor and ask for a program for Speech and OT. He also recommends us to visit a development pedia [which we haven't done yet]. This is also to make sure no activity will trigger anything that will cause discomfort for her.

So, we went to a Rebab doctor in Makati Medical Center, with Dr. Melissa Mercado. After her assessment, she gave us this program"

Speech Therapy:
1. OPM Testing
2. Ariculation Testing
3. Language Stimulation - follow commands, Identifying object (tactile stimulation)
4. Expressive skills
5. Articulation therapy - syllable / word

Occupational therapy:
1. Bilateral hand activities
2. Auditory stimulation / tactile stimulation ( as blind )
3. NDT's to facilitate pelvis control
4. Gentle strtching hips
5. Ankle positioning

Now we're ready for the theraphy session. :)

An Angel in Silence

It has been a year now since Yvonne lost her speech "again".

We just notice that she gradually have had trouble uttering words. But she's very good in replicating sounds [snore, sneeze, and some funny noises with her mouth]. She also tried to imitate my whistle though it is still a work in progress.

We have already asked her neurologist few months ago about what could be the cause. Few tests were made. Based on her EEG, there are still some siezure spike on her brain. Especially on the left side where language and speech are subserved by the brain. Her meds were increased to the maximum. Her doctor said she's doing great [having Depakote, Keppra 500 & 250] in such dose. We just have to be wary of symptoms like nose bleeding and the like. As of this writing, Thanks God!, no signs of that.

While waiting for some improvements, I made some inquiries [emails and phone calls] from some speech therapy centers. I never thought it was this hard to find one. Most center do not have avaiable slots so we're still on the waiting list. We're still in search for a speech therapist.

For the mean time, we're trying to motivate her to utter sounds, do some facial massage and stimulate her senses. Well, its still best to have someone who specialized on this.

In God's time, we'll find one! Aja! :)


   "We need to find God, and he cannot be found in noise and restlessness. God is the friend of silence. See how nature - trees, flowers, grass - grows in silence; see the stars, the moon and the sun, how they move in silence.... We need silence to be able to touch souls."
   ~Mother Teresa

Person with Disability (PWD) 20% Medical Discount Now Available

PWDs may now avail of 20% medical discount (From People's Tonight - published June 10, 2009 and in National Council on Disabilty Affair (NCDA) site )

Filipinos with disabilities may now avail of discounted medicines and other health related services!

The Department of Health (DOH) recently issued Administrative Order No. 2009-0011 detailing the guidelines for the provision of medical and related discounts and special priviledges to persons with disabilities pursuant to Republic Act No. 9442, an act amending the Magna Carta for Person with Disability (R.A. No. 7277).

Under the administrative order, persons with disabilities are entitled to a 20% discount in the purchase of branded and unbranded generic medecines from all establishments dispensing medicines for the exclusive use of person with disabilities; and 20% discount for the cost of medical, dental, and rehabilitation services, diagnostic and laboratory fees in services wards and pay section of government health facilities in accordance with the Clinical Practice Guidelines or Hospital Treatment Protocols and in all private hospitals and medical facilities.

Other discounted services include psychological or developmental tests in service wards of government hospitals; and speech therapies or services in all private hospitals and medical facilities.

In the same administrative order, persons with disabilities who are not yet non-paying PhilHealth members may become PhilHealth members if they are sponsored or enrolled by their respective local government unit (LGU) or voluntarily enroll themselves as individually paying members.

To avail of the discount, a person with disability must present his/her identification card issued by the National Council on Disability Affairs (NCDA) or by the local government units (LGUs) where he/she resides. In addition, a purchase booklet issued by the LGUs to persons with disabilities for free shall be presented every time a purchase of medicine is made.

For more inquiries, please contact the department of Health-Degenerative Disease Office at Tel. no 743-8301 local 1750, 1751 and 1752.

My little angel :)

Yvonne meets Fr. Mario :D

It was a wonderful experience to be present in the healing mass of Fr. Mario Sobrejuanite at the Megamall Megatrade Hall 1.

We always watch his Tv Mass at Studio 23 every 9 o'clock in the morning. Even though we already attended a six o'clock mass in St. Michael's Parish, it seems like my Sunday is not complete without hearing his homily.

We went there last Sunday, August 10, 2008, with Yvonne. The mass celebration was so solemn with the choir singing and dancer dancing. After the mass, Yvonne and I went there in front, near the altar, to be blessed by Fr. Mario. I carried her even though she's sleeping that time. When Fr. Mario saw Yvonne, he prayed over her. As if wanting to show off, Yvonne pulled her back up and lifted her head against me. She was very happy as Jesus touched her through Fr. Mario!

I thank God for this wonderful experience.

P.U.S.H. = Pray Until Something Happens!

I also wanted to share this heart warming story ( from maggie's blog )

----------------------------------------------------------------------
P.U.S.H. = Pray Until Something Happens!
(Author Unknown)

A man was sleeping at night in his cabin when suddenly his room filled with bright light and the Savior appeared. The Lord told the man He had work for him to do, and showed him a large rock in front of his cabin. The Lord explained that the man was to push against the rock with all his might. This, the man did, day after day.

For many years he toiled from sun up to sun down with his shoulders set squarely against the cold, massive surface of the unmoving rock, pushing with all his might. Each night the man returned to his cabin sore, and worn out, feeling that his whole day had been spent in vain.

Seeing that the man was showing signs of discouragement, the Adversary decided to enter the picture by placing thoughts into the man’s weary mind: “You’ve been pushing against that rock for a long time, and it hasn’t budged. Why kill yourself over this? You’re never going to move it” —thus, giving the man the impression that the task was impossible and that he was a failure. These thoughts discouraged and disheartened the man.

“Why kill myself over this?” he thought. “I’ll just put in my time, giving just the minimum effort and that’ll be good enough.” And that’s just what he planned to do— until one day he decided to make it a matter of prayer and take his troubled thoughts to the Lord. “Lord” he said, “I’ve labored long and hard in Your service, putting all my strength to do that which You’ve asked. Yet, after all this time, I haven’t even budged that rock by half a millimeter. What’s wrong? Why am I failing?”

The Lord responded compassionately,

“My friend, when I asked you to serve Me— you accepted. I told you that your task was to push against the rock with all your strength— which you’ve done. Never once did I mention to you that I expected you to move it. Your task was to push. And now you come to Me— with your strength spent, thinking that you’ve failed. But is that really so?”

“Look at yourself. Your arms are strong and muscular. Your back sinew is mighty. Your hands are callused from the constant pressure;and your legs have become massive and hard. Through opposition you’ve grown much and your abilities now surpass that which you used to have. Yet you haven’t moved the rock. But your calling was to be obedient and to push and to exercise your faith and trust in My wisdom. This you’ve done. I, my friend, will now move the rock.”

At times, when we hear from God, we tend to use our own intellect to decipher what He wants. What God ACTUALLY wants is just simple OBEDIENCE and FAITH IN HIM. By all means, exercise the faith that moves mountains, but know that it’s still God who moves the mountains.

P.U.S.H. = Pray Until Something Happens! When everything seems to go wrong, just P.U.S.H. … When the job gets you down, P.U.S.H. … When people don’t react the way you think they should, P.U.S.H. … When your money looks funny and the bills are due, P.U.S.H. … When people just don’t understand you, just P.U.S.H.

Quotes i'd love to keep

I just wanted to share these quotes i found over the web and email that became a part me.

"If I can keep my heart and mind open, train myself to listen and see beyond the surface, then more will be revealed, and the greater the opportunity to serve others." - Emily Abrera

This is from Pravs World - Grab the Opportunity

Opportunities - Small or Big. They come and go.
Some will be easy to take advantage of, some will be difficult.
But once we let them pass in hopes of something better,
those opportunities may never again be available.

Always grab the first opportunity.

This is my friendster horoscope last June 13, 2008

Making choices about your life based on what you think other people want you to do is not only unhealthy, it's unwise. No one knows what is best for you better than you yourself, so stop listening to the know-it-alls who just love to hear themselves talk. Trust yourself -- even if you make a mistake, it will be one that will teach you an important lesson. It'll also help you avoid that same pitfall next time. Independent thinking is not only healthy -- it is wise!

:)

The Pursuit of Happyness

I just love this film.


Plot Synopsis

The film begins in 1981 in San Francisco, California. Linda and Chris Gardner live in a small apartment with their son, Christopher. Chris has invested the family's life savings in a franchise selling portable bone density scanners. These scanners provide slightly denser pictures than X-rays, but most of the doctors Chris visits find that they are too high-priced. Linda works in a dead-end job in a local hotel laundry. The tension between them mounts as unpaid rent and bills continue to accumulate. Chris often parks his car in disallowed areas so he can make scheduled appointments on time, and after parking tickets remain unpaid, their car is impounded. After missing a shift at her job, Linda finally leaves without their son Christopher, returns briefly, then departs for New York City, where a better job awaits her, leaving behind the boy at his father's request.

Chris accepts an unpaid internship at brokerage firm Dean Witter Reynolds that promises employment to only one trainee at its conclusion. His lack of salary and failure to sell more scanners leaves him riddled with debt, he and his son eventually become homeless. After spending several nights riding buses and sleeping in subway restrooms, saddled with their meager belongings, they begin lining up at the Glide Memorial Church on a daily basis in an effort to secure accommodations for the night. Sometimes they succeed, other times they literally are left out in the cold. As he struggles to provide a semblance of a family life for his son under the most dire of circumstances, Chris becomes more determined to complete the intern program and become the sole trainee the firm will hire.

In the end, Chris gets the job and later starts his own brokerage firm.


Memorable Quotes

Christopher: Hey dad, you wanna hear something funny? There was a man who was drowning, and a boat came, and the man on the boat said "Do you need help?" and the man said "God will save me". Then another boat came and he tried to help him, but he said "God will save me", then he drowned and went to Heaven. Then the man told God, "God, why didn't you save me?" and God said "I sent you two boats, you dummy!"

Christopher Gardner: Hey. Don't ever let somebody tell you... You can't do something. Not even me. All right?
Christopher: All right.
Christopher Gardner: You got a dream... You gotta protect it. People can't do somethin' themselves, they wanna tell you you can't do it. If you want somethin', go get it. Period.

Martin Frohm: What would you say if man walked in here with no shirt, and I hired him? What would you say?
Christopher Gardner: He must have had on some really nice pants.

Christopher Gardner: It was right then that I started thinking about Thomas Jefferson on the Declaration of Independence and the part about our right to life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness. And I remember thinking how did he know to put the pursuit part in there? That maybe happiness is something that we can only pursue and maybe we can actually never have it. No matter what. How did he know that?

Christopher Gardner: [voice-over] This part of my life... this part right here? This part is called "being stupid."

Christopher Gardner: [voice-over] This part of my life... this part right here? This is called "happyness."

Reverend Williams: The important thing about that freedom train, is it's got to climb mountains. We ALL have to climb mountains, you know. Mountains that go way up high, and mountains that go deep and low. Yes, we know what those mountains are here at Glide. We sing about them.

Five Steps

From My Big Love's movie, I will have to apply these in my life (esp. on loosing weight and being financially free)

Step 1: Set your Goal
Of course; you cannot reach for something that does not exist. As much as possible, set a more realistic goal. Don't set goals that are not possible. (Like loosing 20 pound in 2 weeks, or being rich in 1 month)

Step 2: Start Today!
It's now or never! Start today! Not tomorrow, not later. Nothing will be done if you keep on saying i will do it later. If you have something to be done there may not be later. So do it today!

Step 3: No Shortcuts
Easy comes, easy goes. its true. If you do not know the value of something, it's so easy to let go. That's why many lotto winners still end up being poor. Because it is not a hard earned money, it easy to splurged on anything.
I have also tried diet pills without exercise. I truly lose some pounds in a month but after taking these pills I gained weight again! Gosh! Maybe because I don't know how to limit myself. Sigh!

Step 4: Get Inspired
Have a picture of a sexy avatar in front of your monitor! hahaha
Here's mine!


Or think of how many people you can help when you became rich!

Step 5: Be Happy!
It's always been my motto. Be Happy! Just be happy in everything that you do and life's trial would be just a piece of cake.


God Bless! :)

Only her eyesight was lost not her

Yvonne had a repeated VEP or visual evoked potential at St. Luke’s Hospital to check if her eyes can respond to visual stimuli such as flashing of lights. And just before Yvonne's 5th birthday (last Jan 16, 2008), it was already confirmed by her eye doctor that she could no longer see. Even eyeglasses won’t be much of a help. Right now she can only visually perceive light and dark.

I was not surprised. I already knew that since last December 2006 after her last operation. It was due to the brain pressure when her shunt was pulled out that her optic nerve was damage.

At first I was really hurt and cried a little. I only have this feeling that she cannot see us anymore but still hoping that eventually her eyesight will be back to normal like her speech. As what the saying says “The truth hurts but it will set you free.”

Right now I have already accepted the fact and enjoying every moment with my little angel Yvonne. Only her eyesight was lost not her. That’s a lot to be thankful for, isn’t it?


Want to know the secret why I have a better outlook in life? It’s because I start my day with a smile. Yvonne wakes up every morning with a big smile, as if very thankful for another day given to her by our Creator. This is because of my angel. :)

Yvonne has a good memory...

As we all know, our brain performs an incredible number of tasks:

• It controls body temperature, blood pressure, heart rate and breathing.
• It accepts a flood of information about the world around you from your various senses (eyes, ears, nose, etc.).
• It handles physical motion when walking, talking, standing or sitting.
• It lets you think, dream, reason and experience emotions.

Only just few months ago when I realized what Yvonne’s Nuero Surgeon has always been telling us. This is why they do not give much hope for Yvonne. They thought she will not last this long.

Here’s why:


The last image is what we always see in her CT Scans since birth. There's a thin line of brain tissues pressed outwardly by CSF. Any additional pressure will be very fatal.

But amazingly, she was able to do many things.

• She can now count 1 to 20.
• She was able to memorize songs like Bahay Kubo, Twinkle twinkle Little star, First stanza of How Did you know, and may others.
• Her speech is clear. She’s not “bulol”
• She can now pick her nose (hahaha!)
• And more…

Despite of her situation, Yvonne has a good memory.

She is now turning 5 on January 2008. Hopefully we can send her to special school next year. And I wish I could be a full time mom to look up to her C”,)

Have a happy long weekend !!! God Bless ! =)

God's Miracle

Our Faith was again put into a test.


Last October 2006, Yvonne was confined for 72 days for shunt revision-turned-replacement due to infection. This is very traumatic on her part since she lost her speech and vision.

Before that, we thought everything would be according to what we planned. We already scheduled her for a pedia development on November 2006.

We thought we could send her to a special school and for therapy after that because she’s already 4yrs old and doing very well.

But the saying says, “Expect the unexpected.”

We went home, after almost 3 months of confinement, starting all over again.


The doctors said her brain was damaged by the infection and they are not sure if she will recover from it. The brain will heal itself, maybe after 6 months, after a year or maybe not anymore.

She had signs of cerebral palsy; she drools because of her locked jaw (so I prepared blended food supplement for her every morning); she was unable to follow things with her eyes; she can’t talk nor smile nor even cry; she had no muscle control (she bites her lips most of the time, her hands were stiff and she can’t move it on her own.)

There was a long period of silence in our house. Sometimes, we watched her videos and tears keeps falling from our eyes. We missed her cry, her laughter, and her voice. We are looking forward to the day she laughs again.



Sometimes, there are many questions running at the back of my mind. What went wrong? Why did it all have to happen? Why her? Should we sue her surgeon and the hospital for medical malpractice? Do we need to do anything legally? Should we send her for a therapy for a faster recovery? I ask the Lord if I need to do anything? HE answered back “No! Just submit to my plan for you. If you will just trust me everything will be just fine.”


“There are things in LIFE that we question a lot, but little do we realize that answers come when we stop asking... and that's what we call FAITH...”


God really know how to send His message to us. That time, I saw some verses from the bible, saying something like we should trust the doctors for God has given them the talent to cure the wounded and the sick. I realized, maybe things must really happen for His plan for others to happen. I also realized, maybe it was just an eye opener for us. We maybe become too proud about ourselves that’s why He makes us kneel before Him and taught us to always be humble.

I once thought that contentment is the key to happiness but I was wrong. If we were so fulfilled with what we have, we might not need any help from Him. But God wanted us to need Him. He doesn’t want us to forget Him. So God gives us trials to remind us of Him, to remind us of His great love for us.


Being positive on everything that happened, I still think of all the good things that have happened during that time. She was alive. Her lungs were ok (the doctor said the lungs may fail as a side effect of anesthesia). We went home with her without NGT. The doctors removed it before we were discharged since she can already swallow her food (a blended milk supplement with boiled vegetables and fresh fruits). We also met so many people, patients, parents, nurses and doctors. Most of all, we felt closer to the Lord.

As days passed by, little by little, we saw some development on her. She can now eat her regular soft diet. She was able to control her hands. She already can point her nose, teeth and tongue when asked. She can now smile. Even her doctors were amazed with her.


But just last May 2007, due to sepsis, she was confined again at pediatric ICU for a week. Her heart rate and BP was dropping. The doctors didn’t know why. All kinds of test were done. She was referred to different medical fields; Pediatrics; Infectious; Pulmonary; Neurologist; Neuro-Surgeon; Ophthalmologist; but they still can’t find the main cause.

For the first few days, I was confident that everything would be fine. I trust the Lord fully. But maybe I was not praying too hard. The doctors admitted that they couldn’t do anything for Yvonne. There’s a possibility that her heart will just stop beating and they can’t do anything about it.

But God really knows how to make us kneel before Him. I cried a lot, thinking of the fact that we might loose her. That’s the time I finally submitted fully to Him. Not just praying for the healing of Yvonne but I finally gave her up to Him. Whatever is His plan for her and for us, I just let HIS will be done in our lives. If He decides to take Yvonne, we will be happy and will accept it. But if he would only give us another chance to prove to Him that we can be better parents to her, we will make the most out of it.

My husband, Mannix, was in New Zealand that time for training and project assignment. He was also worried and decided to go back.

As if God have showed us a miracle, Yvonne’s BP and heart rate have improved. Praise God! For He is really the Best doctor!

The doctors were still puzzled but rather send us home. Even before discharged, they still can’t explain why and what causes her BP to dropped. This is the first time we heard about the DNR (Do Not Resuscitate) Letter as one of her doctor suggested us to sign. He said they might not know what to do when this happen again.

As soon as we got home, as if nothing happened, Yvonne showed us a big smile. She was happy she’s home. And we are too! That day she started to laugh again and even recovered her speech gradually. Amazing isn’t it?? Praise GOD for he is really great!


After 3 months, just last August 2007, she was again confined due to pneumonia at pediatric ICU. She was intubated for 7 days to help her breathe. The doctor said, due to her condition (Spina Bifida & Hydrocephalus & scoliosis), her lungs collapsed as they have little space to expand.


Our hospital stay was extended up to 3 weeks since the doctors can’t wean the oxygen support for Yvonne. Tough she was generally okay, no fever, no cold, no seizure, etc; they still cannot remove it since her oxygen was dropping based on the oximeter. Her lungs were still clogged by the pneumonia and she was having a hard time breathing.

Her doctor again gives us papers to sign, a letter of consent for Euthanasia or Mercy Killing. He explained to us that this is just an option for us and it is still up to us if we wanted to sign it. Since Yvonne was then supported with oxygen and we all know about her condition, this is just to shorten her sufferings. Another option they gave us is that we can go home with oxygen.

It was really hard for us to accept this fact but if it is really HIS will then who are we to disobey?? My husband and I talked about it openly and we cried together.

It has been four years. She gave us so much joy. We know time like this will come sooner or later. We just have to be ready. But only GOD has the right to decide whether to take her life or not. We decided not sign any consent. If we are to bring her home with oxygen, it’s fine with us as long as she is comfortable.


The next day, my husband went to Bambang to look for an oxygen tank. We also met the brother-in-law of my colleague that works in CIGI so we can rent a hassle-free oxygen concentrator. But God depicts another miracle; Yvonne can now breathe on her own and showed her doctor how strong she is. When the doctors saw her, they immediately send us home with two thumbs up!

Also during this time, Yvonne has cried again after ten months. This only means that her brain has improved a lot. And it takes two hospitalizations to bring these all back.

We were drained financially, emotionally and spiritually, but God has provided for us. With the help of all the people around us for support, we have survived.


We really felt how much God loves us. And this only proves that whatever is lost, as long as you trust God and hold on to Him until the end, He will give it back to you, even tripled. I have also learned that we don’t have to question why things happen. Lets just trust Him. His plan is better than ours. These trials make us a stronger person in preparation for His coming. :)

We know this will not be the last. But we don’t have to worry because when God is with us we can endure everything :) May God Bless us all !!!

Prayers of the Sick

For a Sick Person

O Father of mercies and God of all comfort, our only help in time of need: We humbly beseech thee to behold, visit and relieve thy sick servant N. for whom our prayers are desired. Look upon him with the eyes of thy mercy; comfort him with a sense of thy goodness; preserve him from the temptations of the enemy; and give him patience under his affliction. In thy good time, restore him to health, and enable him to lead the residue of his life in thy fear, and to thy glory; and grant that finally he may dwell with thee in life everlasting; through Jesus Christ our Lord. Amen.

For Recovery from Sickness

O God, the strength of the weak and the comfort of sufferers: Mercifully accept our prayers, and grant to your servant N. the help of your power, that hisAmen. sickness may be turned into health, and our sorrow into joy; through Jesus Christ our Lord.

or this

O God of heavenly powers, by the might of your command you drive away from our bodies all sickness and all infirmity: Be present in your goodness with your servant N., that his weakness may be banished and his strength restored; and that, his health being renewed, he may bless your holy Name; through Jesus Christ our Lord. Amen.

For a Sick Child

Heavenly Father, watch with us over your child N., and grant that he may be restored to that perfect health which it is yours alone to give; through Jesus Christ our Lord. Amen.

or this

Lord Jesus Christ, Good Shepherd of the sheep, you gather the lambs in your arms and carry them in your bosom: We commend to your loving care this child N. Relieve his pain, guard him from all danger, restore to him your gifts of gladness and strength, and raise him up to a life of service to you. Hear us, we pray, for your dear Name's sake. Amen.

Before an Operation

Almighty God our heavenly Father, graciously comfort your servant N. in hishis cure. Fill his heart with confidence that, though at times he may be afraid, he yet may put his trust in you; through Jesus Christ our Lord. Amen. suffering, and bless the means made use of for

or this

Strengthen your servant N., O God, to do what he has to do and bear what hehe may be restored to usefulness in your world with a thankful heart; through Jesus Christ our Lord. Amen. has to bear; that, accepting your healing gifts through the skill of surgeons and nurses,

For Strength and Confidence

Heavenly Father, giver of life and health: Comfort and relieve your sick servant N., and give your power of healing to those who minister to his needs, that hehis weakness and have confidence in your loving care; through Jesus Christ our Lord. Amen. may be strengthened in

For the Sanctification of Illness

Sanctify, O Lord, the sickness of your servant N., that the sense of his weakness may add strength to his faith and seriousness to his repentance; and grant that he may live with you in everlasting life; through Jesus Christ our Lord. Amen.

For Health of Body and Soul

May God the Father bless you, God the Son heal you, God the Holy Spirit give you strength. May God the holy and undivided Trinity guard your body, save your soul, and bring you safely to his heavenly country; where he lives and reigns for ever and ever. Amen.

For Doctors and Nurses

Sanctify, O Lord, those whom you have called to the study and practice of the arts of healing, and to the prevention of disease and pain. Strengthen them by your life-giving Spirit, that by their ministries the health of the community may be promoted and your creation glorified; through Jesus Christ our Lord. Amen.

Thanksgiving for a Beginning of Recovery

O Lord, your compassions never fail and your mercies are new every morning: We give you thanks for giving our brother (sister) N. both relief from pain and hope of health renewed. Continue in him, we pray, the good work you have begun; that he, daily increasing in bodily strength, and rejoicing in your goodness, may so order his life and conduct that he may always think and do those things that please you; through Jesus Christ our Lord. Amen.

---

The Healing Mass at Mall of Asia

We've heard about these healing masses months ago. Na feature na din sya sa Jessica Sojo Report. Kinuha pa nga namin yung mga contact numbers nila kasi gusto naming puntahan kaso walang time.

Last June, when we are watching Studio 23 Sunday TV Mass, we saw Fr. Mario Sobrejuanite. Maganda sya mag homily, palabiro, pero may mapupulot kang aral. Every end ng mass inaannounce nya na may healing mass daw si Fr. Fernando Suarez na gaganapin sa MOA on July 30, Monday at 3pm. Fr. Fernando Suarez is a very known Healing priest, sa Canada sya naka base. Pero pumupunta punta sya dito. Natuwa ako kasi baka eto na yung chance naming makapunta. So we set the date.

I’ve never been to Mall of Asia, sabi ko kay Mannix puntahan namin before mag Monday, so July 29, Sunday, pumunta kami just to know kung saan yung event. Sa Music Hall daw sa Entertainment Mall.

Monday, 7:00 am pa lang nakaligo na si Yvonne. By 9am nakaalis na kami ng bahay. Dumating kami sa MOA mga 10 mins before 10am. Madami na din ang tao… akala nga naming mauuna pa kami… pero tama lang ang dating namin. Umabot pa kami sa first 100 ng first batch. So pumila kami. Tapos may nag sabi sa amin na yung mga mag papa heal daw na naka wheel chair or Strollers, I papriority daw so iba ang ticket. Binigyan kami ng White ticket, isa sa akin at isa kay Yvonne. Sila mannix, byanan ko saka yaya ni Yvonne pumila sa red ticket. Then after namin makakuha ng ticket sabi pede daw muna kami magikot ikot at kumain ng lunch. Balik na lang kami by 12pm. Sa Center Stage Cinema na daw kami pumunta kasi magpapapasok na sila nun. So kumain na muna kami pero mga 12:30 na kami nakabalik. Pag akyat namin, ang haba na ng pila. Gosh.

Pila kami. Sabi ng mga nag aassist pila lang daw yun ng red Ticket. Sabi namin “San po ang pila ng white ticket?” “Naku mamaya pa yan papapasukin mga 3pm pa.” Ganon?! Naniwala naman ako, so tumabi muna kami. Pero ndi ako mapalagay. Sabi priority daw, saka 3pm ang start ng mass. Nag tanong kami ulit. Ganon pa din ang sinasabi nila, pila lang daw yun ng red Ticket. Naku! Kawawa naman si Yvonne, antagal naming inintay tong araw na toh tapos ndi makakaattend, ang aga pa naman naming dumating kanina mauna lang sa pila tapos ganito din pala. Mahigpit sila. Organized. Pero ndi yata lahat well informed.

Pero I really had this feeling na may mali eh. Pumunta kami ni Yvonne sa unahan ng pila. Tinanong ko kung san po ang pila ng White Ticket. Kasi ang sabi sa amin priority naman daw sila. Ndi naman sa nag papaimportante kami pero kung ndi lang sana ganon yung sinabi sa amin kanina eh di sana nakakuha kami ng red ticket. Kinulit ko yung mga nag aasist ng pila sa unahan. Then sinabi ko na yun yung pag kakainform sa amin kanina. Then sabi ni Mannix, cge mag red ticket na lang kami swap kami para lang makapasok si Yvonne. Thank God! May lumapit sa amin at sinabi pede na pumasok ang white ticket kasi priority yun. I really almost cried. I was relieved.

Pag pasok namin sa loob dun kami nakapila sa likod ng orchestra. Malapit lapit na kami sa dulo buti na lang nakaabot kami sa cutoff. Nakatayo lang ako pero okei lang. 1pm naka pasok na din sila mannix. Dun na sila sa pangatlong hilera.

Andaming tao puno ang loob ng cinema. All ages. From babies to oldies. May mga ndi makalakad, may mga naka stretchers pa nga daw. May mga bata na may Cerebral palsy, ung katabi ko baby din pero may butas ang ngala ngala. Ang hirap tandaan nung term sa sakit na yun. Wala ako nakita na same situation kay Yvonne.

All set na, si Fr. Suarez nalang inaantay. While waiting we were interviewed by a staff of ABC 5. Dun kasi yung Sunday TV Mass ni Fr. Suarez every Sunday at 1pm. Tinanong kung pano ba namin nalaman yung event, then questions about faith. Tapos kinukuhanan si Yvonne ng camera. Wow! Baka makita kami sa TV. Ehehehe.

At 3pm, Dumating na si Fr. Suarez at nag start na din ang mass. By his words, you will feel the Lord’s presence. And at the end of the mass he conducted a general healing prayer for all. Nakakagaan ng pakiramdam. Enough na yun sa akin. I know naman na HE’s always with us, guiding and protecting us, and leading us to the right path towards Him. Pero may narealize ako, sabi ni Father “Ask and it will be given to you.” Though, God knows our heart’s desire, He waits for us to ask for it. And we should be hopeful that it would be given to us in His time.

After ng mass, nag start na din ang healing, past 4pm na din. Inuna na yung pila namin since ndi makakaakyat sa stage yugn mga naka wheel chair and strollers, kaya pinaprioritize. Yung mga naka wheel chairs pinapatayo ni Father after nyang hawakan yung mga parts na may sakit. And you will hear their testimonials. And you won’t believe na eto yung mga ndi makalakad kanina na nakaayat pa ng stage. At last, it’s our turn. He touches Yvonne while saying a prayer, then Mannix and me, then me and Yvonne. It’s a wonderful feeling. I was teary eyed. I know God touches us that minute through Fr. Suarez.

After the healing session, we went home with a whole spirit and hopeful that everything will be fine and will happen according to His plan for us.

It has been a long day for us. But I don’t feel tired. It’s worth all the effort.

"Ask and it will be given to you; seek and you will find; knock and the door will be opened to you. For everyone who asks receives; he who seeks finds; and to him who knocks, the door will be opened." —Matthew 7:7–8

God wants us to come to him with our needs and desires. He tells us that if we would only ask and have faith, we would receive.

Lets make our life simple and happy :)

I believe everything happened for a reason. And everything happened because they are destined to happen. Though we still do not understand why, I am sure it is preparing us for something. Whatever trials we’ve been through it should not make us a less but a better person. We should learn from it. It should make us stronger.

Let us look at the bright side. As R.H. Schuller says, “Always look at what you have left. Never look at what you have lost.” We have to stay positive whatever problem we may have. People have different burdens. Don’t ever think that yours is worst than the other. Don’t ever think you can’t handle them. Because in every trial, there’s always an answer, there’s always a helping hand and there’s always a lesson to learn.

It tests our faith and our whole being. The way we handle our problems reflects who we are. So why worry if you know things will be resolved when the right time comes. We just have to deal with it.

We may not have all our prayers answered. But a better plan is beginning to happen. We may not notice it because we are too focus on what we do not have instead on enjoying what we have. In result, we feel bad and unfulfilled. If people are only contented on what was given to them maybe life is simple and happy. But we are just human and we want everything else other people have because they are happy. We feel that if we have that “something” we will be happy. But we are not because we’re only human.

I can say that I am happy now. I have my Family, my husband, Mannix, and my daughter, Yvonne.

Mannix, of all people on the Internet, and I have met in a strange time on my life. I believe that we are destined to have each other. That was the time when I asked Him of the right person and he just popped out of nowhere. He’s a blessing in disguise and my knight in shining armor. He may not be the ideal guy but I can say he’s the perfect man for me.

Yvonne does not have everything but she have something that makes me happy. I do not wish her to be what she can’t be. I am just simply happy she’s there to make my day complete. I hear people say, “if only she can …”, If only I had the same thinking I’ll be very sad for her as a mother. But I don’t see it that way. She was given to us not to make our life difficult but to help us be closer to Him, to teach us to be humble, to help us see little miracles in life, and to make us realize how blessed we are to have her.

I also have a lot of things in mind. I have a lot of to-do list. I have a lot of plans and wants. But I have learned that things will just happen when the right time comes. We do not have to rush things. We should live one day at a time. And we should treasure what we have now and make the most out of it. Always count your blessings. Always look at the bright side. Be positive. That’s what I am applying in my life. Life is great. It is a gift from God.

Heaven's very special child

A meeting was held quite far from Earth.
"It's time again for another birth,"
said the angels to the Lord above.
"This special child will need much love,

His progress may seem very slow,
Accomplishments he may not show
And He'll require extra care
From the folks he meets way down there.

He may not run or laugh or play ;
His thoughts may seem quite far away.
In many ways he won't adapt,
And he'll be known as handicapped.

So let's be careful where he's sent,
We want his life to be content.
Please, Lord, find parents who
will do a special job for You.

They will not realize right away
The leading role they're asked to play
But with this child sent from above
Comes stronger faith and richer love.

And soon they'll know the privilege given
In caring for this gift from Heaven
Their precious charge, so meek and mild
Is Heaven's very special child

Thinking 'bout my purpose...

I woke up one day thinking about my purpose. I know everything that happened is well planned. I know that every little thing that is happening today is for the better. I know God has a plan for me. I may not know it right now. I may not understand it right now. But I believe and whole-heartedly trust in Him. Because He knows what’s best for everyone.

Flying colors

After graduating from high school, I made a promise, when I finish college I will make my parents be proud of me. I want them to feel that all their hard works were not wasted. Six semesters had past, I really did my best. But on my last year, I don’t know why, but I lost my focus. (Is it really I? Or my instructor who had the guts of failing the whole class for not passing a one-time oral exam to fill up her absences?) It’s graduation day when I realized, I’ve broken a promise. I could have been marching up that stage with flying colors. Regrets filled up my soul.

What can I do? So I let bygones be bygones. Later I realized landing on a good job earlier than I thought. He may not have given me what I wanted most but He gave me what I will love doing in the long run. Maybe that’s what He wanted me to realize. :)

Destiny

I am one of the so-called “Stupid in Love”. Let’s just say my past relationship was not healthy. My mind tells me to let go but my heart is still holding on. Until my whole being gave up, so I stopped struggling and go with the flow. Then I told Him, “Ok! I know you know better, so let Your Will be done.”

Time passed by. And out of nowhere there pop a message from a stranger. And that stranger changes everything. That stranger heals my broken heart and made me realized that there’s nothing wrong with me and it’s time to move on.

That stranger ends up being my hubby.

God has his own timetable. We just have to wait.

My Angel

I cried the whole night when I learned about the condition of my first-born child. So many questions asked with no answers. Why me? What did I do? Why her? But then I realized that one time I asked God to remind me of him always. May be this is His way of doing that. So I kept that in mind.

Trials were given to make us stronger. It's there for us to learn to appreciate every little thing that was given to us.

I asked God to make my handicapped child whole.

God said, “No, her spirit was whole, her body was only temporary”;

Contentment is not the fulfillment of what you want, it is the realization of how much you already have.

I may not have an ideal life, but I am contented with what I have. And I am happy.